Babel

"Now the whole world had one language and a common speech.  As men moved eastward, they found a plain in Shinar and settled there. 

Then they said, "Come, let us build ourselves a city, with a tower that reaches to the heavens, so that we may make a name for ourselves and not be scattered over the face of the whole earth."   Genesis 11:1-2,4

"so that we may make a name for ourselves".....  I wonder how many times I've been there and not even realized it.  How many times have I set out to do something great and the hidden motive in my heart has been to make a name for myself? 

How often have I masked my own selfish ambition with doing something "for God"?  How often have I longed for the place that only belongs to God?

"But the Lord came down to see the city and the tower that the men were building.  The Lord said, “If as one people speaking the same language they have begun to do this, then nothing they plan to do will be impossible for them.  Come, let us go down and confuse their language so they will not understand each other.”

So the Lord scattered them from there over all the earth, and they stopped building the city.  That is why it was called Babel —because there the Lord confused the language of the whole world. From there the Lord scattered them over the face of the whole earth."
Genesis 11:5-9

And how gracious is God to see me on a path that will not be good for me and intervene, confuse things, do whatever it takes to remove me from a destructive path? 

He knows that making a name for myself would not go well for me.  He knows that I am most fulfilled and safe when I am bearing fruit for His glory and completely dependent on Him and not myself.

And how often do I shake my fist in His face for confusing my plans, for setting up a roadblock on the path I was on.  I will never know on this side of heaven what He saved me from when He interrupted my plans!

I pray that my life would make a name for Jesus Christ, for His glory, for His fame and that God would confuse and prevent any plan that is to make my name known. 

I won't always understand what He saw down that path that He didn't let me stay on, but I will trust that He is good and is always at work to protect me and draw me closer to Himself!

Praying and Singing...Not Whining and Complaining

"Around midnight Paul and Silas were praying and singing hymns to God, and the other prisoners were listening.  Suddenly, there was a massive earthquake, and the prison was shaken to its foundations.  All the doors immediately flew open, and the chains of every prisoner fell off!"  Acts 16:25-26

Paul and Silas were doing exactly what God has asked them to do and ended up being "severely flogged and thrown into prison with their feet in stocks". 

Interestingly midnight in that cell didn't find them contemplating how this could have happened:
Does this mean we missed God's will somewhere? 
Is God just not faithful? 
Maybe God's not really good....

They're also not praying and agreeing together that they'll get released from this prison, justified and found innocent.  They are not even whining and complaining...and they have been severely flogged and are sitting in prison, not knowing what was coming next!

I'm ashamed at how much time and energy I've spent begging God to fix whatever is making me uncomfortable or insecure and how little time in difficult moments I've spent simply praising Him....not for what I want Him to do for me, but just because He is who He is and for what He's already done for me.  

Perhaps what Paul and Silas understood what was at stake.  Is MY comfort and MY security and MY future really what's important here?  The Bible tells us that as these guys were singing to God, "the other prisoners were listening."  And when a bit later, "the chains of EVERY prisoner fell off"...Not because they prayed a prayer of faith or joined in with the singing, but because Followers of Christ were there and weren't wasting their time begging God to make them comfortable. 

Was it worth the beating and time in prison to Paul and Silas when everyone's chains fell off and the jailer's entire family came to faith..... I feel sure they would say "Yes!".  

God needs us to go where people are hurting (or in chains and a prison of sorts).  Sometimes He calls us and we willingly go there.  Sometimes we find ourselves there without agreeing. 

Wherever you are and whatever you are living, live it with hope and praising God. 

You never know who is watching and listening.  And you never know what's really at stake!

What Does It Take?

A little recap of what I got to share at church this weekend:

From 1 Kings 18 and 19

"Elijah the prophet walked up to the altar and prayed, 'O Lord, God of Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob, prove today that you are God in Israel and that I am your servant. 

O Lord, answer me! Answer me so these people will know that you, O Lord, are God and that you have brought them back to yourself."

Immediately the fire of the Lord flashed down from heaven and burned up the young bull, the wood, the stones, and the dust.  

And when all the people saw it, they fell face down on the ground and cried out, "The Lord - he is God! Yes, the Lord is God!"

When Ahab got home, he told Jezebel everything Elijah had done, including he way he had killed all the prophets of Baal.

And after the fire there was the sound of a gentle whisper. When Elijah heard it, he wrapped his face in his cloak and went out and stood at the entrance of the cave." 

"Answer so these people will know that you have brought them back to yourself."  The people saw God's amazing hand come down in one of the most extraordinary moments in all of the Bible.  And they were moved and fell down and cried out that He is God!!

"Ahab told Jezebel everything that Elijah had done".   Ahab was there too and saw the awesome display of God answering His prophet.  But he walked away unmoved, unchanged, unimpressed, unconvinced.  

And then Elijah who was discouraged, confused, exhausted, depressed to the point of wanting to die, hears God whisper.

The question for us is: What does it take for us to be moved, changed, impressed and convinced by God?  Are we like the majority of the people and it takes a fireball from heaven, but we get it after that?  Are we like Ahab: it's just never enough, never enough like I thought God should do it, never enough like I wanted God to do it, never enough......  unmoved, unconvinced.....

I want to be like Elijah, even when I don't understand and things have gone terribly wrong, and I feel alone and abandoned and confused, at the end of my rope, and convinced that I don't have the strength for even one more day......I hear Him whisper......  and I am moved, convinced, changed......

The day after I shared at church, my Michael started throwing up blood and we ended up in the ER....and here we still sit.  We think we're finding answers, but this is slow and long.  I've spent many many days and months seeing my boy in pain, not always knowing where it was coming from, praying for answers, wondering how many more days he or I or any of us could do this anymore.

And then God whispers.....or sometimes even rains down provision like fire from heaven.  Sometimes I walk away like Ahab and don't recognize His hand at work.  Other times I hear Him whisper and He moves me.  I have to stay in a place of allowing Him to be God and trust that He knows what needs to be done from His eternal perspective and not from my earthly one.

I pray today, wherever you are and whatever overwhelming thing you face, that you will hear God whisper, and that His whisper will move you and sustain you and fill you with enough faith and courage to take the next step!!

Rest

"Find rest, O my soul, in God alone;
my hope comes from him.
He alone is my rock and my salvation;
he is my fortress, I will not be shaken.

My salvation and my honor depend on God;
he is my mighty rock, my refuge.

Trust in him at all times, O people;
pour out your heart to him,
for God is our refuge."    Psalm 62:5-8

Where does my soul look for rest and comfort?  Where do I expect my hope to come from?  On what does my honor depend?  What do I trust in?  To whom do I pour out my heart, my deepest fears and hopes and dreams? 

If I'm honest I have to admit that my natural inclination is not to fall before God and pour out my heart when I need hope and rest.  I tend to pick up the phone or go to a friend's house.  Don't get me wrong, God has given me amazing friends (and especially sisters) to call and go to for encouragement and perspective.  But I cannot go to them instead of or before I go to the source of all real rest and comfort and peace and security.  And good friends, in the end, go there with me when I go to them!

The New Living Translation calls a refuge "a rock where no enemy can reach me".  No enemy of bad news or discouragement or failure or sickness can reach me there.  That doesn't mean I won't experience those things in my lifetime, but it does mean that they will not take me down and do not have the power to take my rest and hope.

"We are pressed on every side by troubles, but we are not crushed.  We are perplexed, but not driven to despair.  We are hunted down, but never abandoned by God.  We get knocked down, but we are not destroyed." 
2 Corinthians 4:8-9

Pressed on every side, perplexed, hunted down, knocked down! 
But never crushed, driven to despair, abandoned by God or destroyed! 

May you have rest and hope through whatever you face today!

Do I Notice??

Several years ago Michael had surgery on his feet in France.  There was a little boy 2 doors down from us who never had a visitor, only the nurses came and went from his room.  We weren't allowed to visit him.  We were told that would be some kind of privacy violation.  We only saw him laying in his bed as we passed by.  But he touched our hearts and we prayed for him every time we thought of him, even years later.  We even cried tears for him, the boy whose name we didn't even know.

I'm not sure what his diagnosis was, but he only lay in his bed and moaned every now and then.  Weeks later I wrote the following poem about him.  

The poem is not only for this little guy or for children who are "unnoticed" or seemingly laid aside.  It is for anyone who is dismissed or forgotten or feels that who they are is overlook in some way.  

This little guy still motivates me to look beyond what I see, to remember that there is an eternal soul inside of every body, that Jesus came and died for all.  It challenges me to notice each one!

No One Seemed To Notice

I walked past his hospital room and saw him staring into space
No one seemed to notice 

The nurses seemed to know his happy sounds from his groans for help 
They moved in and out of his room without a word or touch
If he was more aware than he appeared 
No one seemed to notice

No special lights, no music playing
Only a silent room with pale blue walls
His days ran into each other
Without an effort made to comfort or understand
And no one seemed to notice 

I paused at his door with a heavy heart
He was woven in his mother's womb
He was created in God's own image
For him a Savior died
But no one seemed to notice

What would his life have been like
If the body had been able and strong
He would have had gifts, interests, strengths
He would have left a mark on the earth
Now no one seemed to notice 

I thought ahead to the day when his pain will end
He will run the streets of heaven in his body whole and new
I wondered if his place will be honored
For the pain he suffers here
I guess then everyone will notice

Until that day he'll stare at walls
He'll groan for help
He'll be fed and washed
He'll spend his days on earth feeble and weak
Then slip away to the better place
I wonder if anyone will notice

Without boundaries

The way the Bible tells me to love is hard! 

I'm told to put others' needs before my own, to be patient, kind, to never give up or lose faith, to always hope, to love through every circumstance....no matter what.  I'm not to be jealous or proud or rude or to demand my own way.  Perhaps the most difficult of all, I'm not to keep a record of what others do to me or to the ones I love.
(from 1 Corinthians 13). 

It's hard enough to read that passage with those closest to me in mind. But then I read these words:

"You're familiar with the old written law, 'Love your friend,' and its unwritten companion, 'Hate your enemy.' I'm challenging that.  I'm telling you to love your enemies. Let them bring out the best in you, not the worst. When someone gives you a hard time, respond with the energies of prayer, for then you are working out of your true selves, your God-created selves. This is what God does. He gives his best - the sun to warm and the rain to nourish - to everyone, regardless: the good and bad, the nice and nasty. If all you do is love the lovable, do you expect a bonus? Anybody can do that. If you simply say hello to those who greet you, do you expect a medal? Any run-of-the-mill sinner does that."
Matthew 5:44-47 (from The Message)


So I'm even supposed to love those who hurt me and are mean to me like that?: not keeping a list of what they've done, not exposing how mean they've been to me (even on Facebook!), never losing hope and faith for them, not secretly being happy when bad things happen to them?  That's a whole different challenge. 

When someone is blatantly mean or unfair to me or to someone I love, I'd rather get on the phone and talk about them than pray for them.  I at least want to tell about it on FB and not mention their name...just their sin. I want others to know that I was wronged and that they are BAD!

My friend Jen just described someone to me and said, "His love just has no boundaries".  As she said that I thought, "What boundaries does my love have?"  What line can someone cross that puts them out of range for my grace and unconditional love?  I have to be honest, love has boundaries in my heart.

Jesus' love certainly had NO boundaries.  Thank goodness because that means He loves me...and you....and the one who has hurt us and done us wrong. 

So I'm asking Him to give me grace to remove the boundaries of my love so that I can love like He does! 

"We love because he first loved us."  1 John 4:19

Allowed to Serve

A couple of weeks ago I came to the end of my rope!  Several things contributed, but the primary thing was trying so hard to figure out my Michael's needs.  We of course have on-going behavioral issues and are often changing up his meds. But added pressure has been from his platelets bouncing around and he had stopped eating and no one could figure out why.  When I forced him to eat, he would throw it all up.

I had spent the week contacting every doctor I could think of who might be able to figure this out.  We had done a swallow study and an upper GI test which all came out normal, and we had cleaned up puke all week and my house smelled terrible.  In addition, I couldn't help my boy feel better. 

We had just come from a therapy session in the pool (which is normally his favorite place on the planet) that had gone very badly!  I was embarrassed and frustrated and worn out and had a lot of questions for God that week.  I kept reminding Him of how much better we could all serve Him if He would just heal Michael or send answers that would settle things down.  I felt like I could get back to the important things if I could just get this stuff settled.

I sat on the stairs right below where Michael was sitting to put his brace on his foot.  I had his foot in my hand when I heard the Holy Spirit whisper to my heart, "One day, when you see things as they really are, you will thank me for allowing you to serve him."  I took his precious feet in my hands and kissed them and thanked God for choosing me to serve His special boy!  I'm so grateful He didn't give him to anyone else.

Perhaps God doesn't see a broken boy who is just lucky to have someone to take care of him.  Maybe, just maybe, He sees a giant spirit inside of a broken body that will not be broken one day!  For some reason I tend to think that a better investment of my time would be teaching or singing or doing something that makes an obvious big impact. 

What if, in God's eyes, cleaning up vomit, putting a brace on a crooked foot, holding a hurting or confused boy tight as he falls asleep, restraining him for hours when he's upset so he doesn't hurt himself, looking endlessly for what would bring him peace, and trying to put words to his thoughts and feelings is a higher call?  What if when I do that, it brings God more glory than I can imagine.  What if the change it makes in my spirit and heart cannot be measured?

"And the King will say, 'I tell you the truth, when you did it to one of the least of these my brothers and sisters, you were doing it to me!'"  Matthew 25:40

"Now we see things imperfectly, like puzzling reflections in a mirror, but then we will see everything with perfect clarity.  All that I know now is partial and incomplete, but then I will know everything completely, just as God now knows me (and my Michael) completely."  1 Corinthians 13:12

What a patient God I serve!  He pulled the veil back briefly and gave me a little clearer view for a split second.  And I am grateful.