Fear

One of my favorite things about living in France is being so close to Normandy. Whenever someone comes to visit, we take a day trip to the beaches there and remember the importance and sacrifice of freedom and liberation.

Recently we had a friend from the States visiting and we watched the series The Band of Brothers before visiting Normandy. This follows a unit of paratroopers through the liberation of Europe during World War II and tells their true stories.

Several things about this series move me deeply, including a scene showing the paralyzing fear of one particular soldier. While all of the other soldiers are running towards the enemy, not pausing with men falling dead all around them, this young man is terrified and lays in his foxhole unable to move. The shocking thing about that scene to me is not so much the one laying paralyzed from fear, but the ones running towards danger with fearless determination. Where does one get courage like that?

During a break in the fighting, a Commander comes over to speak to this fearful Private. He simply says to him, "Your problem is that you still have hope. You don't realized that you are already dead." He encourages him to fight like a dead man.

These men fought like dead men for the freedom and liberation of a world that was being taken captive one country at at time. They were fighting for ones who could not fight for themselves. Today we are in a similar battle.

"For we are not fighting against people made of flesh and blood, but against the evil rulers and authorities of the unseen world, against those mighty powers of darkness who rule this world, and against wicked spirits in the heavenly realms." Ephesians 6:12

In the Bible I'm told, much like that Private, that I too should consider myself already dead.

"I have been crucified with Christ and I no longer live, but Christ lives in me" Galatians 2:20

Sometimes "Angela" has hope that she doesn't have to die; to selfish ambition, to earthly security, to position or places of influence, to a flawless reputation, to the respect of those around me, to my rights and my conceit, to whatever has placed itself before Christ on the throne of my heart. I no longer live, but Christ lives in me. Too often I find myself cowarding in a foxhole, hoping to live, while others charge past me fearlessly liberating those being held captive. Sometimes I even fire, not at the enemy, but at whatever is trying to pull me out of my foxhole and threatens my "right to live".

I long to be fearless. I long to let my selfish ambitions and vain conceits die so that Christ can fully and completely live in me.....and turn me into a soldier who fights like a dead man! Too much is at stake for me to fight for my own rights and spend my life running after things that don't satisfy. When I stand face to face with my Savior one day, I hope to hear Him say, "Well done, fearless soldier!"