Limits

This is a picture of our Christmas gift from God. As we began to open our gifts, we looked out of the window and saw the most beautiful sunrise I have ever seen. The pictures we took don’t do it justice. I’m sure we were not as overwhelmed or impressed as we should have been at how great and awesome God really is!

Limits….this is what has been on my mind for several days, maybe even weeks. Every single life has them. We are limited physically, emotionally, mentally, and in every area of our lives. Even our time and energy are limited. We all seem to constantly try to push back the limits. For example, we try to go with as little sleep as possible when God clearly meant for us to sleep. I wonder why we feel like sleep is a bad, lazy thing to do? My pastor once said, “If our goal is to be more Christ-like and a lack of sleep makes us irritable and short with people (clearly not like Christ at all), then it must be that getting enough sleep is a Christ-like thing to do”. But we not only push that limit, everyone around me (including the person I look at in the mirror every morning) seems dissatisfied with what they are able to accomplish. We are frustrated with having limits, we work hard to eliminate them, we see our limits as the enemy, as weakness.

It also seems that each life has different limits. So, does God “bring” these limitations into our lives or does He “allow” them? That is a discussion I will leave to people much more educated and wise than myself. I have long ago let that one go and have simply tried to trust God more with what He has “given” or “allowed”.

As Jim and I look at our future and pray about direction, we are well aware that the limits in our lives are very different than what we thought they would be. As we face our 50s, we realize that life doesn’t look like we thought it would when we were dreaming and praying during our 20s. Being the parents of a handicapped child makes this new approaching season look very different than we thought it would. We have other limitations too, of course.

We are maybe a bit more realistic as we plan these days. The whole of France probably won’t come to know Christ during our lifetimes!! We won’t ever have an empty nest that gives us freedom to pick up and go at a moment’s notice. We will most likely not live near each of our children as they begin their families and start their lives as adults. And on and on I could go. Life took twists and turns that we didn’t expect, and we turned out to be way more limited and fragile than we thought.

On the other hand, God turned out to be way more loving and sufficient than we ever dreamed. You see, my plan was to be incredibly successful and productive. God’s plan was to show me how great He is when I am weak….how sufficient He is when I’ve reached my limits and can go no farther. It’s often in that place that He uses me in ways I never thought possible. My plan was to somehow become perfect, but His plan was to show me my need for a Savior. My plan was to show thousands of people the love of God, His plan was to show me how deep His love is by having me love one very limited little boy. Amazingly, HE doesn't seem to be limited or bothered at all by MY limitations and smallness.

So I sit here today, embracing the limits that God has allowed or given. He could have created us without needing anything from Him…..without limits. We don’t all have a handicapped child, but we each have the “limit” that we have to deal with. In the Bible, Paul called his a “thorn in the flesh”. He asked God to remove it. Surely he would have been more productive and fruitful without that limit, whatever it was. But God chose to leave it….maybe to remind Paul that He needed a strength that was not his own. Maybe to remind him each day that He was in desperate need of a Savior.

I’m very close to the place where I am thanking God for my limits instead of trying to ignore that I have them and getting frustrated when they prevent me from doing all that I want to do. The amazing sunrise on Christmas morning reminds me that I have a God with no limits. He is great, I am small. All is as it should be. All is well.

Angela