Living Between Joy and Grief

The Christmas Season is officially here!

If you are like me, you spent last week acutely aware of all that you have to be thankful for. I am amazingly and abundantly blessed, way beyond what I deserve.

So...why the knot in my stomach this morning? Why the sadness? How can joy and gratitude be so mixed with grief and sadness?

Christmas is a time of joy. We remember and celebrate the Messiah who came to rescue us. He was not content to leave us as we were. He did what it took to leave His Holy Spirit for our ongoing healing and restoration.

He is a perfect Savior.

But we still live in a broken world, we still live with loss, regret, broken relationships, sickness, and pain.

For me Christmas is a reminder that my boy is not all that I hoped he would be, maybe all that he should have been. I have a teenager living in my home who lost her mom and was left all alone in the world. I got a call from a friend this morning who is overwhelmed today by the loss her divorce caused in her life. I heard from another friend who re-grieves her family's loss when her 5 year niece died of brain cancer. The holidays are a reminder that we are deeply loved by our God, but also a reminder that all is not as it should be here.

Maybe I have my Michael to keep me connected to that truth. In him I experience grief and loss, I feel unequipped and inadequate, my patience is tested and I fail as often as I succeed. In him I experience God's grace and provision in a way I never knew was possible. In him I experience joy and gratitude with every smile and small achievement.

I am aware every minute of every day that I desperately need a Savior. I'm aware that He is enough and provides all that I need.

So I'll carry on, living in this place between amazing joy and unbelievable grief. I know His grace is enough. And I know a perfect eternity waits for all of us where there will be no more tears, no more bad news, no more sickness, no more pain, no more weakness, no more loss, no more handicap.

But the angel said to them, “Do not be afraid. I bring you good news that will cause great joy for all the people. Today in the town of David a Savior has been born to you; he is the Messiah, the Lord. Luke 2:10-22

The good news is this: A Savior came for us who knows all and understands all. This give me great peace!

May you experience the hope and love of Jesus where you are, as you are this holiday season!